If I Am Honest

Comfort In My Own Skin

If I am honest….

My hands are big and bumpy with bulging veins.

My feet burn with mild throbbing, vibrating pains.

My stomach is unfeelingly large, old and lazy.

My vision blurs in and out and mostly hazy.

My arms are achy but able to lift.

My hair is thinning.  My scalp adrift.

My nose is large and itchy,  fighting to take over my face.

My memory plays tricks, hiding keys, taking a date to a different place.

My teeth vibrate with mild discomfort, disliking the dentist who brings more hurt.

My legs are swollen, marbled with veins. Is that the result of too much dessert?

My ears can hear, my nose smell, my eyes see, my tongue taste, my hands can feel.

I am in fine shape at 68, though if you ask me most days, I’d say not ideal.

 

So what happened to that girl of twenty-three, who loved and dreamed with glee?

Did she use her body to love them all?  Did she find the magic key?

Was she able to change the world with her love? Did she make the best of choices?

Did she take the roads less traveled?  Did she listen to her inner voices?

 

Am I like the Velveteen Rabbit who gave its all for love? You know,

I think I am.  I have been faithful throughout my life, now I’m ready to let go.

It’s not that I will die today,  tomorrow or the next, I have much more to give,

Let this  be a time to share, give thanks, receive, forgive.

It’s time to celebrate the life together and feel the goodness of all that has been.

So I won’t measure myself against celebrities and I’ll be comfortable in my own skin.

— Barbara Dean Aliaga

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