What are your feelings telling you?

EmotionsI’m talking about cautionary feelings today!

I have always considered myself intuitive. Certain feelings made me think I was receiving cautionary messages from someone who had a bigger vision than I.  I would not go into a store when this negative feeling came to me.  Or I would choose another campsite when this uneasy feeling came over me.  I sometimes would get a hunch about someone.

I understood negative feelings to be messages directing me to avoid certain danger.  I imagined that I was being protected.  I became apt at recognizing these emotions and responding accordingly.

I was vigilant.  I watched for negative emotions. I recoiled and ceased to participate until I could feel better. I was proud that I could recognize these messages and save myself from an unknown fear!

I now realize that these interpretations are not only rescuing me from unhappy situations, they are putting me in a cloister safety zone.  I can continue using negative emotions as my personal safety net, but my life  becomes narrower and narrower.

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Participation is one of my biggest desires.  Yet my desires were conflicted by refraining to participate.  I needed to take a second look at my attitude.

True or False:  Negative emotions send messages of fear-and-flight?

Yes and no.  The question is, has this understanding of intuition served me?  I can only decide this from looking at my life experiences.

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Fleeing more and more opportunities because I feel the “fear emotion” has trended toward isolation and a non-social lifestyle.  It has permitted me to write, paint, play music, meditate and enjoy nature. but is this the only lifestyle I want?  Don’t I love being and sharing with people?

The flee or non-participation approach seemed to work fine for me at one point in my life. Now it doesn’t.

If I felt a negative emotion when I was invited to a party, I would politely give reasons why I could not go.  I read articles that confirmed it was a better idea to Just say no! than to force yourself to do something you didn’t want to do.  It was confusing.  If I was invited to go on an outing and received a negative emotion, I would not go.  If I got an idea to call a friend and a negative emotion came up, I would put off the phone call.  I actually believed this would help me.  I thought to myself, My timing may be off and it is not a good time to call.  I was pretty proud of this intuitive gift of safety.

This approach led down a path where I convinced myself I was predestined to have a more quiet life.  This is something I would need to accept. As time went on, friends gave up on me, thinking that I wasn’t interested in them or what they did.  I had little idea that this approach was leading to the opposite lifestyle that I desired.

And here is wherein the premise is faulty for me.  There is more lovely and luscious life to experience! I am tending more toward the belief it is possible to be safe, enter into unknown situations, and interpret your uneasy emotions as Please take a second look!  It could hold the kind of adventure you are looking for.  I now am moving ahead into new spheres of my life.  How this will happen?   Life experiences are my only way of knowing.

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Life experience tells me that I can participate by changing my point of talking about a situation or thinking about a situation.  Life experience tells me that there is always time to stop and listen to the thoughts that feel bad.  When I hear the thoughts, I have the opportunity to see through different eyes.  In changing my thoughts to a more comfortable, positive attitude about my situation, I change my situation… every time!

So, the way I was thinking of a friend who I wanted to call but didn’t, was triggering an uneasy feeling. I realized I was thinking I might be bothering my friend so I didn’t call.  I consciously changed my thoughts to I always am a loving person and my friends feel good when I call .  Now it is easier to call.  Now I have something to give.

I know that my attitude can change my ability to see what is in front of me.  Attitudes are like great, magical glasses.  They can change the look of anything! …and instantly!   My cautionary feelings are alerts to look at things in a new light.  You never know what you will see differently.  You never know what can develop within one day when you take second and third looks!

I hope these words are helpful to you and look forward to hearing about your attitude perspectives.  Today is a good day to have a good day!

 

Speaking of Love

All You Need Is Love

— but how does it serve you?

What if you think of love as an energy force that mirrors whatever it hears from you? What if you think of love as an energy force that is as close to you as you are to yourself?

You use a heart drawing as a symbol of love.  I heart you.   Everyone recognizes its meaning.

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The heart has been beating ever since it became a heart.  It continually beats without stopping until the day you leave your body.  This symbol of love reminds you that life is constantly working in the background and constantly available to you.

When you do not understand how life works, you can become confused and feel like a leaf whirling about in the wind.  Yet the energy of love continues to beat within  every situation at hand.  Because love is non-physical it has the power to expand and duplicate situations that match your desires.  If you run, your heart beats faster.  If you go to sleep your heart beats to a slower pace.  Love expands all physical situations and is attentive to whatever direction you wish to take.  You may think you want to be happy, but your inner conversation complains about this or that. These complaints are heard and activated.  Your complaints are what love expands for you.  Is this something you have ever thought about?

You may not be aware of this interpretation. I hope it is helpful to you.  You may not be aware that love gives you whatever you want!  Now that you are aware, be careful about what you ask for in you thoughts and conversations.  And, what about complaining? When you complain you send requests that say you want to experience what the complaint looks like.

This sense of  expanding seems like something new,  You find yourself in a situation you do not like and you become frightened by the situation.  You become more and more concerned and the situation seems to get worse.  More things happen that make you frightened.

Example One:  You find that your coffee machine is broken.  It makes you clearly upset because you won’t have your coffee before leaving for work.  You begin to feel bad about your whole life.  While you get dressed, you remember how unlucky you are that you never have won the lottery.  It’s a recurring thought and it seems perfectly normal to have this thought as you get ready for work. You go into your closet and feel you can’t find a thing to wear!  You walk out to the car and step in a muddy puddle.  You say, Well, that’s just fine!  I’m a total failure!.    You go in and clean up your shoes, and your internal conversation goes on.  You think about how your mother told you how careless you are. You begin to believe her.  You stand up, look at the clock on the stove and see you are running 15 minutes late.  How did that happen?!  Can’t I even keep track of time.  No wonder I don’t get promotion!    You get in and start the car, and drive to the end of the street.  Sure, the traffic light can’t even help me!  you yell.  It appears that the light is stuck!  You wait and wait and wait!   …and feel miserable!

Example Two:  You find that your coffee machine is broken. You are surprised, but you are trained to STOP and PAUSE.  You look out the window and see the beautiful sunshine and watch a bird pecking around in your garden.  You look back at the coffee machine and remember it appears broken.  You then remember that you have a French Press somewhere in the cupboard.  You get some water to boil.  You begin to feel that this day is going to be a fun adventure.  You remember how much you love French Press coffee, and now have this opportunity.  While you wait for the water to boil, you finish dressing and think about how much you love the outfit you’ve put together.  You turn on some music, put the water into the French Press, squeeze the grounds and enjoy the aroma of the coffee.  Everything good always happens to me! you hear yourself say.  You put your coffee into a traveling mug and head for the door.  You feel great and enjoy the front yard  You see the mud puddle and miss it entirely.  You drive with ease and care.  You are ready to stop at the traffic light, but it continues to be green.  You begin to think about work and how you can make it a better place today! There’s a parking place right in front of your workplace, and you weren’t even looking for one.  Life is always great for you!

These examples demonstrate how the energy of love expands and contracts according to your thoughts.   Change always matches your inner conversations, your inner attitudes, your fears and your confidence.  If you have been following these blogs, you know things are going to continue to expand in a direction that of your thoughts.  Your love energy is matching your internal conversation just as it matches the beating of your heart when you are running or sleeping.

You may have been  threatened by the expansion and contractions of situations  Up to now, you may have  become fearful of bad situations and changes in your life.

How can we handle the fear of change?

Previously we have talked about listening to our emotions.

You can first STOP/PAUSE and look away to something more pleasing, then look back at the changed situation with new eyes.  Unless there is a true life/death situation, you do not need to react immediately.  And, you never need to give into negative impulses.

Ask yourself, how will this situation change with negative attitudes?  if I allow negative impulses to direct me, how will I ever get out of this situation?  You are in a world where the basis of who you are matches your every thought.  When you don’t like something, STOP/PAUSE.  Then ACCEPT THE SITUATION.  Accept it as a mirror of what you’ve been thinking about lately.  Make a note to change your way of complaining or talking or thinking.  Start looking at a brighter side of life and brighter situations will naturally follow.

When you begin to experiment with this basic idea, you will see just how futile it is to place blame on others.  You are free to suffer and you are free to flourish.  Negative thoughts can only produce negative situations.  Positive thoughts can only produce positive situations.  ….  Something to think about today.

Bound By Love

Thoughts can change your situation

Aunt Barbara's Powerful Little Book of Comfort

Yesterday, I wrote about Attitude changes.  Today, I am sharing a chapter in a book I published in 2011.  I hope it will support you in a positive direction that enables a happier level of life. If you are serious about the complaints you make about your situations, there is a way to improve every situation.

Excerpt from Aunt Barbara’s Powerful Little Book of Comfort, ByBarbara Dean Aliaga SMASHWORDS EDITION * ****PUBLISHED BY:Barbara Dean Aliaga on Smashwords, Aunt Barbara’s Powerful Little Book of Comfort Copyright © 2011 by Barbara Dean Aliaga ISBN: 978-1-4660-0545-7
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Chapter 3:  Thoughts can change your situation

There is no denying that your loss has changed everything.

It is to be hoped that you took a little break and are ready to begin this recovery process again. You will probably agree that what you are going through is a crash course in spirituality, general semantics, universality, science, philosophy, psychology, and who knows what else. You didn’t ask for this change.

You may be resisting this sudden devastation. You don’t remember anyone asking if you wanted to change. And, that feeling hurts! Whether your God is a picture of a loving father, a mighty deity, a universe, a flower, tree or river, the stars above or an unknown energy, I hope love is the center of your understanding.

Depending on your understanding of how things should be, you could experience an equivalent surprise. You may feel confusion. You may even feel that your belief system has let you down. And that hurts worst of all. You may feel that whatever your understanding is, it has allowed this loss to occur. How could this happen, you repeat to yourself throughout the day. I didn’t think this could ever happen to me. You are lost in your surprise and you are drowning in your sorrow.

Probably you feel like crying right now. When you read the words above, your whole reality changes to sadness. Thoughts created these emotions. You can control your thoughts that lead to unhappy feelings.

Consider this. Your attitude, your thoughts, can create 100 percent of your happiness or unhappiness. Thoughts have power. A very clever person came up with this interesting piece of information: when you count the letters in “attitude” as they fall in the alphabet they add up to 100%.

A=1 T=20 T=20 I=9 T=20 U=21 D=4 E= 5 Word = 100 percent

This is a brilliant way to remember that your attitude will produce one hundred percent of your reality. If the majority of your day is spent with an attitude of sorrow, there is nothing to be expected but a sorrowful day. It does not mean that you have to sustain positive attitudes 100% of the day. However, the more positive attitudes or thoughts you can entertain during the day, the happier your situation seems to become. You draw more, and more happy thoughts to your mind and your reality manifests more, and more happy situations for you and those around you.

When a loved one dies or leaves you in marriage, your attitude can be nothing less than sorrowful. You and your loved one may have been so very close, and now you are overflowing with thoughts of separation and loss.

When you suddenly end up in the hospital with a devastating disease, your attitude can be nothing less than dreadful. You are filled with thoughts of loss.

When you lose your job or your home, your attitude can be nothing short of fear. You are filled with thoughts of loss.

In all of these scenarios, your initial attitude will be unhappy. The rush of unhappy thoughts cause a blanket of unhappy situations.

Drugs that can suppress these sad thoughts are available and may be useful to you. There can be another way to let the negative thoughts drift off into oblivion by replacing them with warm, happy thoughts. I am here to help you get through.

The key is to begin soon to redirect all of this unhappiness toward attitudes of well-being. Because if you allow yourself to continue down the road of misery, you begin to construct a more permanent tape recording that will be played over and over and over. Each time it is played you will feel bad and you will hopelessly create a sad reality and wonder why.

There are moments after a loss that you wish you could have done or said something differently and you become entangled in those self-defeating thoughts. It will do no good to continue to try to relive these moments. You can only learn from any feeling that you have and remember how you want to act when future opportunities present themselves. You can replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts in a split second.

This is an opportunity, a way to change things before they become your way of life. You cannot ask people to rescue you from the pain and continually host thoughts of sorrow.

Little by little, you need to build roads, make inner tape recordings that make you feel happier. This is a gradual process and you are beginning and succeeding as you read and as you create your positive thoughts.

You may have always thought that you had little to do with your reality. You may have heard from earliest years, “What will be, will be”. I have experienced that it is a good thing to accept

what is, what has taken place. I have also experienced that I can cause a brighter future by living with positive thoughts in the present moment. I have experienced the fact that I can change things with my attitude. I am convinced that your thoughts can cause a happier reality.

What are positive thoughts? They are easy to identify. Positive thoughts cause good feelings, like wellness, peacefulness, ease, cooperation and laughter, to name a few. Negative thoughts cause bad feelings, like disease, irritation, arguments, anger, and bullying. It is simple. It is straightforward. I often wonder why so often the differentiation eludes most of us. I often observe the internal struggle to govern our thoughts.

Thoughts seem to magically appear and we are unconscious of their origin. This unconsciousness is counterproductive to our desire for happiness. We can choose our thoughts. More clearly, we can choose to replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts. Now I’ve challenged you! Now you can leave your miserable feelings and come to a state of happiness for the rest of your life! It is your choice to become conscious of what is going on in your mind.

Sometimes the easiest way to leave negative thoughts is to do something physical. If you’re feeling overwhelmed now, it might help to go to the closest sink and wash your hands. Take your time, use soap and suds up. Feel the water flow through your fingers. Smell the fragrance. Wash your hands until you begin to feel better. Listen to your breathing. See if you can smile at your amazing hands. See if you can find yourself. Now.

If you are in a state of confusion because of a sudden loss, you have a unique opportunity to open your limited view of heaven and earth. You have an excellent opportunity to grow in wisdom and grace.

I can hear you saying, I don’t want this opportunity. I want the things the way they were. I want things back to the way they were. That is indeed an attitude, but one that does not render happiness. It is a negative attitude that you are a victim and with that attitude you will produce a life for yourself that reflects a victim’s lifestyle. Is that really what you want? Didn’t you begin this book so that you would no longer be a victim? Didn’t you want to be happy? Didn’t you ask whether you would ever be happy again? How can you move pass this loss, you ask?

You move pass it by consistently creating an attitude that is positive. Remember positive attitudes produce happy outcomes. Negative attitudes produce unhappy outcomes. It is simple. …and that is the big surprise. It is simple.

Choose Attitudes That Create Better Situations: Consider the difference in Positive Thinking versus Negative Thinking.

I am thankful for what I have versus I am afraid I won’t have enough.

I know things will turn out all right versus I’m afraid I’m in for a rough time.

I love all people versus People always let me down.

I am the luckiest one in the world versus never win anything.

I wonder what I can do for someone today? Versus I wonder if someone will help me today.

I’m going to find something to eat today that makes me happy versus There’s never anything good to eat in this house.

I will have what I need versus I never get what I want.

I’m going to call a friend today versus Why don’t my friends call me.

I’m grateful for my general health versus I hope I don’t catch the flu that;s going around.

The Joy of Attitude Adjustments

The Joy of Attitude Adjustments
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My attitude creates a scope of vision toward everything that is happening in my life.

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E

I love to frequently remind everyone I meet, that the sum of the placement of letters in the word, attitude, adds up to 100, ( a=1, t=20, t=20, i=9, t=20, u=21, d=4, e=5; that’s 100%)! One hundred percent of your attitude creates 100% of your current situation That may seem like a farfetched idea, but I’ve tested it countless times.

How negative attitudes affect our lives

Negative attitudes narrow and blur our outlook on life and limit our possibilities for solutions.  Negative attitudes seem harmless enough, but 100 % of our views are constricted and match the level of our negativity.    What could be a joyful day turns out to be a series of challenges and stressful surprises.  Our situations mirror our attitudes. We may feel like victims, but we can turn things around easily. When we don’t like our situations, we can always change our attitudes and these new positive attitudes will provide a match with upgraded situations.  It’s fun to see how easily it can be done, and what power we have over our daily lives!

Change your attitude, change your situation.

Try out a variety of positive thoughts that can turn frowns into smiles, stress into ease,  gloom into joy!  Every time you adjust your attitude, you will adjust your ability to affect your situation.

When you stop blaming some outside force for your bad day, you can utilize your attitudes to steer you into bright, new days ahead.

There is not much of a life without joy and quiet enthusiasm.  No one can give you joy but yourself!  So get moving, have a free attitude adjustment on me!  Fun times!

Addendum:  When you continue to believe you don’t have the power to change your situations from bad to a more pleasing situation, your belief IS the attitude that keeps you in your current situation.  Until you change this attitude that you are helpless and doomed to remain in the place you complain about.  From time to time, we all get stuck here.  But we don’t have to stay here.  Improve your attitude and you’ll improve your life!

Accepting the situation in front of you, changes everything!

There are many opportunities to change unhappy situations around us.  I guess we just don’t know that we have that power!

Somehow we have come to believe that the only way to change a situation is to fight against it.  It appears that when bad things happen, we spend the majority of time talking about it and shaking our heads in confusion.  We talk and read about things we don’t like and we are confused how these things continue to escalate.

This happens with world current events and it happens in our world.  Situations present themselves to us; we may not be aware that it is our response to the situation that holds more of the same or changes everything.

I am speaking about situations that are within your present moment awareness.  If you think about it, there are millions, no billions, no an infinite amount of situations taking place at any moment.  You are aware of only one of these situations at a time.

Interesting perception! Only the situations that are within your awareness are the situations you believe as true.  But to another person, even a person in the same room, this very situation that holds all of your attention may not even exist in their world.

So what is it about situations that have the power to enthrall us or crumble our confidence?  What really are situations?  What part of a situation is an illusion? How can situations change in time? Where are we, anyway?

More interesting questions! Here are my answers for now.  We may be amazing beings who are able to create situational moments that are so detailed they can fool even ourselves.  We create these situations to objectify our thoughts.  We can expand as we see what we want and what we don’t want, and even what we want to explore further.

This type of perspective can be very helpful in changing situations that are unpleasant to us.  We now have a way to move on to the next lesson when we accept the situation in front of us.  We don’t have to respond to it or necessarily suffer from it.  The suffering may be coming from an illusion we desire to experience.  Why would you want to suffer, you ask?

I do not know.  I do know, however, that if I don’t want to suffer, and I believe I do not need to suffer, I will begin to live a completely different life.  It may seem like a miracle.  It may seem like a brand new door appears from nowhere, and opens up a new reality.  It has the power to surprise and delight me.

By accepting the situation in front of you, by keeping your heart open with optimism and love, great things can emerge.  Think about it.  You have  probably already experienced moments of exhilaration at one time or another.  Can you remember a lovely situation that completely embraced you?  You may have sustained the experienced the happy situation for hours, even days.  Then, you become a little uneasy and questioned whether this kind of well-being was a bit naive  You may have closed the door and entered another irritating situation that felt more familiar.   But it was miserable.  Hopefully, this article will open more doors to happy situations.  The first step is to allow or accept the door as it presents itself.  There is paradise on earth.  It is up to us to find and allow it through trial and error.

The sooner you realize your inner power to create your reality, the sooner you will be able to break the cycle of pain and suffering.  I welcome your thoughts on this topic.  Life can be just as amazing as us!  It is up to us!

Peace!  My upcoming blog hopefully can give some practical ways to change your situations through acceptance.  I look forward to seeing what will come out of these fingers!  Thank you for reading.

 

 

 

 

Self-Confidence – string of consciousness

4374CEE8-22C0-499A-8DF6-B9F0EA5CA541It is so easy to speak and write about choosing happy thoughts. Then a situation  arises that clashes with my current direction.  A rude remark, an oversighor an interruption leading to a misunderstanding. My state of mind then depends on the level of self-confidence that allows an unwanted situation to be brushed off or solved and forgotten

Just how happy am I?  The answer:  as happy as I can heed my own words and return often to a consciousness of happiness. I understand that happiness is always available but so often I loose my confidence in locating it when my situation presents as an irritant. How do I develop this confidence to withstand these irritant situations?

It is impossible to cultivate the skill of self-confidence without putting it into action. Did I think it was an inherent trait? It may have been at one time.  It may have been, before I allowed others: parents, siblings, friends, teachers, church reps, government reps, news reps, heroes and just about anyone who was not me, dictate the direction I should take at any given moment. When I put my voice second to others.  And when others scolded me for listening to my inner guidance and not theirs

My confidence seemed to rise temporarily when it was in agreement with the thoughts of the person I was with. I struggled in stating my unique perspective. I was seldom in contact with who I was and what my thoughts were. And when my statement came out in a group, it came in the form of an argument.  It was often an offensive stance that was not readily accepted, probably because the tone was not understood. Over the years my skill diminished and refused to serve me in the tamest of gatherings.

But have no fear; it is not a gloomy picture at all.  It is the gold lessons of experience. I like to practice and expand many skills. Confidence nudges me daily to move about with, well, confidence!  And by utilizing this skill I am making many discoveries about this adventure called life, ad communication  There is still much to learn  I will be staying around for a while longer!

Today’s objective is to practice confidence by responding to my thoughts. I am determined to be my best friend today.  Self-confidence is a skill I can use to discover my best self, my best life. I am on to something major!  Thank you for sharing in this day’s journey with me and I hope these words are helpful for you!