Often it is not the incident bringing suffering but our perception of the event.
a quote from GETTING TO HAPPY; LEARNING TO READ EMOTIONAL MESSAGES
A tree can fall on two different homes. The first neighbor runs out in terror. Her face twitches with distress. She thinks how will she ever recover! The other neighbor comes out of her home. She runs to comfort her neighbor. She exhibits strength as she focuses on the well-being of the other. She has little blocking her. Many years of diligence brought her to this point. Though the tree fell on both houses, each responded in a different way. Their reactions depended on what negative emotional debris was currently on their individual paths.
Negative debris blocks happiness. When we wish to return to the happiness we love, we find we are blocked by confusion. There are people who have evolved to consistently clear thinking. I am not always this person. I am part of ever changing energy. What appears clear one day can emerge doubtful the next. However, the one thing I have going for me is my commitment to syncing to a happy state.
It is not the things that happen to us. It is the way we think about the things that happen to us.
After ten days of committing to writing, I see the power of commitment. I am refining my attention to what I want. As I tune into repeated focus, I improve the frequency. It becomes easier, more facile.
Commitment to happiness can bring about great returns!
A happy lifestyle can be achieved and improved upon by consistently using maintenance tools. The most beneficial tool for me when I feel angry, lonely, anxious, stressed, is this: STOP! Become aware of my thoughts! Choose words or actions allowing better feelings.
Negative thoughts produce more unhappy, intense feelings the longer you entertain them.
When you mine negative thoughts, (looking for reasons, excuses, past experiences, etc,) you find yourself falling deeper and deeper in negativity. Minus one plus minus one equals minus two. Minus two and minus two equals minus four. The more you hang out with negative thinking, the deeper and louder the negative feelings present themselves.
This is because uncomfortable feelings alert you! What you are thinking is taking you far away from your invisible self of well-being. The more you continue down the road of negativity, the louder your feelings of unhappiness emerge to tell you to STOP, turn around, change your way of thinking, your way of talking. Now!
When you change your way of thinking and talking, when you change the direction by changing activities, you will feel better. Good-feeling emotions say, Congratulations, you are heading in the direction you most want to go!
A positive one plus a positive one equals a positive two. A positive two and a positive two equals a positive four. The more you hang out with positive thinking, the deeper your happiness will become! You can’t miss with positive thinking. The trick here is to practice.
- STOP as soon as you are aware of feeling uncomfortable
- irritated
- stressed
- lonely
- embarrassed
- inadequate
- fearful
- Be thankful for the realization. Describe what is currently happening.
- Find a better-feeling way to describe it.
- For instance: I feel so irritated stuck in the house with so much snow outside! The emotion of irritation alerts you! You are off the happiness course. Turn around! So you say, I’m a little off. Ordinarily I love the snow. Wouldn’t it be nice if I could complete my quilting project while it is snowing.
- Do you feel better? If so, turn on some music and start quilting! You’ve learn emotional navigation!
The longer you can remain with positive thinking, the longer you can live a positive life. It’s really as simple as that. It takes commitment, attention and self-compassion. This tool has worked for me for a number of years and can be helpful for you.
A copy of Getting to Happy is waiting for you!
