Hi everyone! I’m looking forward to the completion of a work-in-process: Getting To Happy. It should be ready for print in December! What a wonderful, fun project. It just keeps getting better.
Here is a partial draft as an introduction. Enjoy! And, keep smiling!
My Loyalty To Happiness
This book is written for me, and offered to you! I find myself struggling when I unconsciously observe situations around me. I often observe sickness, aging, repetitive suffering, misunderstanding, inability to relate in ways that inspire and allow happiness. I know happiness exists eternally somewhere deep inside. I want to revisit my natural inclination to live a happier, more satisfying life. I want to develop physical representations that are pleasing to me by elevating my attitude. I invite you to come along with me. If you are serious about living a happy life, this can be the book to visit often.
I have been told repeatedly that all good things must come to an end. Family members have insinuated that you can’t be happy all the time. Even though I find myself sinking beyond my natural state of happiness, I firmly believe it is always present. It is up to me to allow the frequency that matches happiness. Happiness is my natural state of being. It is possible to live happily ever after. It is possible to conduct myself within certain attitudes that match happiness. There is little to be gained for me to resonate with the lower vibrations of negative thinking. Happiness doesn’t live there. You can disagree with me. You may consider the pursuit of happiness an immature way to approach life. We are free beings capable of choosing any number of thoughts and attitudes. These writings will help you recognize the connection between your thoughts and attitudes, the guiding force of emotional energy and your physical and material outcomes.
I leave the world of happiness whenever I block my natural pathway with negative illusionary thoughts such as irritation, frustration, worry, apprehension, anger and despair. The experience can be like finding myself within a pinball game where my thoughts bounce back and forth against bumper synapses. I may find myself a long way from happiness, when I am comparing myself to family and friends. As I become aware of these thoughts, and reign them in, I can immediately enter the world of satisfaction and peace. When I am not focusing on fears and concerns provided me by the world news, I can immediately enter the world of quiet, cooperation and love.
Happy thoughts cause life-changing, waves of vibration that travel well beyond what I could ever do with actions stemming from duty or guilt. I have taught myself to replace negative words with those that hold positivity. Then any actions will collaborate with joy. Your world will always be what you imagined.
What if you think of love as an energy force that mirrors whatever it hears from you? What if you think of love as an energy force that is as close to you as you are to yourself?
You use a heart drawing as a symbol of love. I heart you. Everyone recognizes its meaning.
The heart has been beating ever since it became a heart. It continually beats without stopping until the day you leave your body. This symbol of love reminds you that life is constantly working in the background and constantly available to you.
When you do not understand how life works, you can become confused and feel like a leaf whirling about in the wind. Yet the energy of love continues to beat within every situation at hand. Because love is non-physical it has the power to expand and duplicate situations that match your desires. If you run, your heart beats faster. If you go to sleep your heart beats to a slower pace. Love expands all physical situations and is attentive to whatever direction you wish to take. You may think you want to be happy, but your inner conversation complains about this or that. These complaints are heard and activated. Your complaints are what love expands for you. Is this something you have ever thought about?
You may not be aware of this interpretation. I hope it is helpful to you. You may not be aware that love gives you whatever you want! Now that you are aware, be careful about what you ask for in you thoughts and conversations. And, what about complaining? When you complain you send requests that say you want to experience what the complaint looks like.
This sense of expanding seems like something new, You find yourself in a situation you do not like and you become frightened by the situation. You become more and more concerned and the situation seems to get worse. More things happen that make you frightened.
Example One: You find that your coffee machine is broken. It makes you clearly upset because you won’t have your coffee before leaving for work. You begin to feel bad about your whole life. While you get dressed, you remember how unlucky you are that you never have won the lottery. It’s a recurring thought and it seems perfectly normal to have this thought as you get ready for work. You go into your closet and feel you can’t find a thing to wear! You walk out to the car and step in a muddy puddle. You say, Well, that’s just fine! I’m a total failure!. You go in and clean up your shoes, and your internal conversation goes on. You think about how your mother told you how careless you are. You begin to believe her. You stand up, look at the clock on the stove and see you are running 15 minutes late. How did that happen?! Can’t I even keep track of time. No wonder I don’t get promotion! You get in and start the car, and drive to the end of the street. Sure, the traffic light can’t even help me! you yell. It appears that the light is stuck! You wait and wait and wait! …and feel miserable!
Example Two: You find that your coffee machine is broken. You are surprised, but you are trained to STOP and PAUSE. You look out the window and see the beautiful sunshine and watch a bird pecking around in your garden. You look back at the coffee machine and remember it appears broken. You then remember that you have a French Press somewhere in the cupboard. You get some water to boil. You begin to feel that this day is going to be a fun adventure. You remember how much you love French Press coffee, and now have this opportunity. While you wait for the water to boil, you finish dressing and think about how much you love the outfit you’ve put together. You turn on some music, put the water into the French Press, squeeze the grounds and enjoy the aroma of the coffee. Everything good always happens to me! you hear yourself say. You put your coffee into a traveling mug and head for the door. You feel great and enjoy the front yard You see the mud puddle and miss it entirely. You drive with ease and care. You are ready to stop at the traffic light, but it continues to be green. You begin to think about work and how you can make it a better place today! There’s a parking place right in front of your workplace, and you weren’t even looking for one. Life is always great for you!
These examples demonstrate how the energy of love expands and contracts according to your thoughts. Change always matches your inner conversations, your inner attitudes, your fears and your confidence. If you have been following these blogs, you know things are going to continue to expand in a direction that of your thoughts. Your love energy is matching your internal conversation just as it matches the beating of your heart when you are running or sleeping.
You may have been threatened by the expansion and contractions of situations Up to now, you may have become fearful of bad situations and changes in your life.
How can we handle the fear of change?
Previously we have talked about listening to our emotions.
You can first STOP/PAUSE and look away to something more pleasing, then look back at the changed situation with new eyes. Unless there is a true life/death situation, you do not need to react immediately. And, you never need to give into negative impulses.
Ask yourself, how will this situation change with negative attitudes? if I allow negative impulses to direct me, how will I ever get out of this situation? You are in a world where the basis of who you are matches your every thought. When you don’t like something, STOP/PAUSE. Then ACCEPT THE SITUATION. Accept it as a mirror of what you’ve been thinking about lately. Make a note to change your way of complaining or talking or thinking. Start looking at a brighter side of life and brighter situations will naturally follow.
When you begin to experiment with this basic idea, you will see just how futile it is to place blame on others. You are free to suffer and you are free to flourish. Negative thoughts can only produce negative situations. Positive thoughts can only produce positive situations. …. Something to think about today.
Yesterday, I wrote about Attitude changes. Today, I am sharing a chapter in a book I published in 2011. I hope it will support you in a positive direction that enables a happier level of life. If you are serious about the complaints you make about your situations, there is a way to improve every situation.
There is no denying that your loss has changed everything.
It is to be hoped that you took a little break and are ready to begin this recovery process again. You will probably agree that what you are going through is a crash course in spirituality, general semantics, universality, science, philosophy, psychology, and who knows what else. You didn’t ask for this change.
You may be resisting this sudden devastation. You don’t remember anyone asking if you wanted to change. And, that feeling hurts! Whether your God is a picture of a loving father, a mighty deity, a universe, a flower, tree or river, the stars above or an unknown energy, I hope love is the center of your understanding.
Depending on your understanding of how things should be, you could experience an equivalent surprise. You may feel confusion. You may even feel that your belief system has let you down. And that hurts worst of all. You may feel that whatever your understanding is, it has allowed this loss to occur. How could this happen, you repeat to yourself throughout the day. I didn’t think this could ever happen to me. You are lost in your surprise and you are drowning in your sorrow.
Probably you feel like crying right now. When you read the words above, your whole reality changes to sadness. Thoughts created these emotions. You can control your thoughts that lead to unhappy feelings.
Consider this. Your attitude, your thoughts, can create 100 percent of your happiness or unhappiness. Thoughts have power. A very clever person came up with this interesting piece of information: when you count the letters in “attitude” as they fall in the alphabet they add up to 100%.
This is a brilliant way to remember that your attitude will produce one hundred percent of your reality. If the majority of your day is spent with an attitude of sorrow, there is nothing to be expected but a sorrowful day. It does not mean that you have to sustain positive attitudes 100% of the day. However, the more positive attitudes or thoughts you can entertain during the day, the happier your situation seems to become. You draw more, and more happy thoughts to your mind and your reality manifests more, and more happy situations for you and those around you.
When a loved one dies or leaves you in marriage, your attitude can be nothing less than sorrowful. You and your loved one may have been so very close, and now you are overflowing with thoughts of separation and loss.
When you suddenly end up in the hospital with a devastating disease, your attitude can be nothing less than dreadful. You are filled with thoughts of loss.
When you lose your job or your home, your attitude can be nothing short of fear. You are filled with thoughts of loss.
In all of these scenarios, your initial attitude will be unhappy. The rush of unhappy thoughts cause a blanket of unhappy situations.
Drugs that can suppress these sad thoughts are available and may be useful to you. There can be another way to let the negative thoughts drift off into oblivion by replacing them with warm, happy thoughts. I am here to help you get through.
The key is to begin soon to redirect all of this unhappiness toward attitudes of well-being. Because if you allow yourself to continue down the road of misery, you begin to construct a more permanent tape recording that will be played over and over and over. Each time it is played you will feel bad and you will hopelessly create a sad reality and wonder why.
There are moments after a loss that you wish you could have done or said something differently and you become entangled in those self-defeating thoughts. It will do no good to continue to try to relive these moments. You can only learn from any feeling that you have and remember how you want to act when future opportunities present themselves. You can replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts in a split second.
This is an opportunity, a way to change things before they become your way of life. You cannot ask people to rescue you from the pain and continually host thoughts of sorrow.
Little by little, you need to build roads, make inner tape recordings that make you feel happier. This is a gradual process and you are beginning and succeeding as you read and as you create your positive thoughts.
You may have always thought that you had little to do with your reality. You may have heard from earliest years, “What will be, will be”. I have experienced that it is a good thing to accept
what is, what has taken place. I have also experienced that I can cause a brighter future by living with positive thoughts in the present moment. I have experienced the fact that I can change things with my attitude. I am convinced that your thoughts can cause a happier reality.
What are positive thoughts? They are easy to identify. Positive thoughts cause good feelings, like wellness, peacefulness, ease, cooperation and laughter, to name a few. Negative thoughts cause bad feelings, like disease, irritation, arguments, anger, and bullying. It is simple. It is straightforward. I often wonder why so often the differentiation eludes most of us. I often observe the internal struggle to govern our thoughts.
Thoughts seem to magically appear and we are unconscious of their origin. This unconsciousness is counterproductive to our desire for happiness. We can choose our thoughts. More clearly, we can choose to replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts. Now I’ve challenged you! Now you can leave your miserable feelings and come to a state of happiness for the rest of your life! It is your choice to become conscious of what is going on in your mind.
Sometimes the easiest way to leave negative thoughts is to do something physical. If you’re feeling overwhelmed now, it might help to go to the closest sink and wash your hands. Take your time, use soap and suds up. Feel the water flow through your fingers. Smell the fragrance. Wash your hands until you begin to feel better. Listen to your breathing. See if you can smile at your amazing hands. See if you can find yourself. Now.
If you are in a state of confusion because of a sudden loss, you have a unique opportunity to open your limited view of heaven and earth. You have an excellent opportunity to grow in wisdom and grace.
I can hear you saying, I don’t want this opportunity. I want the things the way they were. I want things back to the way they were. That is indeed an attitude, but one that does not render happiness. It is a negative attitude that you are a victim and with that attitude you will produce a life for yourself that reflects a victim’s lifestyle. Is that really what you want? Didn’t you begin this book so that you would no longer be a victim? Didn’t you want to be happy? Didn’t you ask whether you would ever be happy again? How can you move pass this loss, you ask?
You move pass it by consistently creating an attitude that is positive. Remember positive attitudes produce happy outcomes. Negative attitudes produce unhappy outcomes. It is simple. …and that is the big surprise. It is simple.
Choose Attitudes That Create Better Situations: Consider the difference in Positive Thinking versus Negative Thinking.
I am thankful for what I have versus I am afraid I won’t have enough.
I know things will turn out all right versus I’m afraid I’m in for a rough time.
I love all people versus People always let me down.
I am the luckiest one in the world versus never win anything.
I wonder what I can do for someone today? Versus I wonder if someone will help me today.
I’m going to find something to eat today that makes me happy versus There’s never anything good to eat in this house.
I will have what I need versus I never get what I want.
I’m going to call a friend today versus Why don’t my friends call me.
I’m grateful for my general health versus I hope I don’t catch the flu that;s going around.
Are you aware of how you approach the precious moments when you wake up?
Let’s make an assessment.
Do you check your body to see if you still have that ache in your leg, or a cold?
Do you rehash an argument you had the day before with a friend?
Do you begin to worry again over your finances?
Do you start to plan and then fret over the project that is still unfinished?
Do you check the latest news headlines?
Can you think of other worrisome thoughts that greet you each day?
These may not be thoughts that are the best for starting your day. There is little happiness in any of these concerns, wouldn’t you agree?
Each day offers a clean slate into the happy life you seek. You can seize this opportunity by guiding your thoughts towards what feels good.
You can begin a little ritual upon waking up. Become aware of how good your body feels wrapped in your cozy blankets. Enjoy the good feeling of your pillows. Feel the wonder of just waking up! Yesterday’s burdens can wait. This is a time for you to enjoy life. These are the precious moments of the day. Remember, pursuit of happiness? If not now, when? Here’s what we can do each day.
Upon waiting up, take advantage of the safety of the moment. Approach these moments with the good feelings that make you smile inside. These few moments upon waking are yours. These moments are your key to a happier day.
On those days when you wake up and find you are still locked into yesterday’s concerns, stop the thoughts by changing your actions. Get up when you are lost in the same worrisome thoughts. Begin an action that makes you feel better. Here are some ideas.
Just go back to sleep and reset.
Get up. Look in the bathroom mirror and give yourself that knowing smile. –You know, the smile, that remembers how cute or clever or funny or bright or awesome you are.
Listen to a motivational talk on-line as you get ready for the day. (There are countless tapes available.)
Listen to your favorite upbeat music.
Look out the window and let yourself enjoy nature
Write a list of activities that would be fun right now if you were someone else
Most of all, find actions that feel good. Allow yourself to be happy first, every day upon awaking, no matter what. Be committed to how you feel. Appreciate what feels good for a few moments every day before you take on any responsibilities. Make a habit of this: Wake up! Appreciate what makes you feel good!
This simple change in how you begin your day, promises to allow new opportunities to unfold during the day. You control the amount of improvement in your life. Opening up the happiness valve at the on-start of day, supports your plans to achieve during the day: to complete your project, heal your illness, complete your project with more ease, to make the world a better place.
Wake up! Appreciate what makes you feel good! That’s good advice because it works! If you know someone who is struggling through their days, please share this article with them and we’ll both make a happier world.
There are many opportunities to change unhappy situations around us. I guess we just don’t know that we have that power!
Somehow we have come to believe that the only way to change a situation is to fight against it. It appears that when bad things happen, we spend the majority of time talking about it and shaking our heads in confusion. We talk and read about things we don’t like and we are confused how these things continue to escalate.
This happens with world current events and it happens in our world. Situations present themselves to us; we may not be aware that it is our response to the situation that holds more of the same or changes everything.
I am speaking about situations that are within your present moment awareness. If you think about it, there are millions, no billions, no an infinite amount of situations taking place at any moment. You are aware of only one of these situations at a time.
Interesting perception! Only the situations that are within your awareness are the situations you believe as true. But to another person, even a person in the same room, this very situation that holds all of your attention may not even exist in their world.
So what is it about situations that have the power to enthrall us or crumble our confidence? What really are situations? What part of a situation is an illusion? How can situations change in time? Where are we, anyway?
More interesting questions! Here are my answers for now. We may be amazing beings who are able to create situational moments that are so detailed they can fool even ourselves. We create these situations to objectify our thoughts. We can expand as we see what we want and what we don’t want, and even what we want to explore further.
This type of perspective can be very helpful in changing situations that are unpleasant to us. We now have a way to move on to the next lesson when we accept the situation in front of us. We don’t have to respond to it or necessarily suffer from it. The suffering may be coming from an illusion we desire to experience. Why would you want to suffer, you ask?
I do not know. I do know, however, that if I don’t want to suffer, and I believe I do not need to suffer, I will begin to live a completely different life. It may seem like a miracle. It may seem like a brand new door appears from nowhere, and opens up a new reality. It has the power to surprise and delight me.
By accepting the situation in front of you, by keeping your heart open with optimism and love, great things can emerge. Think about it. You have probably already experienced moments of exhilaration at one time or another. Can you remember a lovely situation that completely embraced you? You may have sustained the experienced the happy situation for hours, even days. Then, you become a little uneasy and questioned whether this kind of well-being was a bit naive You may have closed the door and entered another irritating situation that felt more familiar. But it was miserable. Hopefully, this article will open more doors to happy situations. The first step is to allow or accept the door as it presents itself. There is paradise on earth. It is up to us to find and allow it through trial and error.
The sooner you realize your inner power to create your reality, the sooner you will be able to break the cycle of pain and suffering. I welcome your thoughts on this topic. Life can be just as amazing as us! It is up to us!
Peace! My upcoming blog hopefully can give some practical ways to change your situations through acceptance. I look forward to seeing what will come out of these fingers! Thank you for reading.
All of us have dreams. They come with anticipation but can also come with doubt and fear. Fear can hold dreams from becoming reality indefinitely. How you live with your dreams, makes or breaks a level of happy creation. This article is written to explore ways to live with and within the dream process.:
Know that a dream already has the power to exist in your life! For instance, you may wish for a new car when your old car keeps breaking down. This becomes your dream. It holds the reality of a new car. The dream is as sure to become a reality in your life as an acorn has the power to become an oak tree. So, why are dreams sometimes so elusive? Can it be that we keep the dream from naturally developing? I think this is possible. An acorn is pretty small compared to an oak tree. So is the dream of a new car, or at least your perception of getting a new car. I believe that dreams have every component necessary to emerge into our reality unless we get in the way by trying to control it through our egos.As an ego gets involved, (and it will always try), it introduces doubt, a need for control over this thought process. An ego is capable of introducing separation from the dream, even conflict. An ego pretends to want this dream but insists it can only be achieved through hard, unhappy work. An ego can hold the dream away from blossoming. An ego introduces pseudo-happiness, the illusion of winning against great odds. In its conflict, this ego separates us from others as it suggests that we are alone. It may suggest a need to right a wrong in order to make a dream come true. We can be unaware of the daily doses of news stories that feed our egos.. We may read an article that states this is not a good time to buy a car. If you believe this might be true, you will not fulfill this dream to own a new, safer car. You may believe yourself to be wise in choosing to put off the purchase, but when the car breaks down again, you feel a sense of hopelessness and anger at your plight. The ego gets in the way of connecting with your natural happy state. Letting go of control and feelings of intense achievement is the first challenge in living within dreams.
Play with your dream. Daily pretend the dream has already come true. Wouldn’t it be fun to have a new car? This is a fine way to play with your dream. Summon up feelings by thinking about how nice the new smell feels or about how much fun it would be to listen to your music in new and fun ways. You feel the power of the new car’s gadgets and safety features. It feels so good! Think about the car with whimsy. It becomes a fun dream to visit every day. The dream itself brings with it many happy days of anticipation. You feel so much fun and satisfaction at the thought of the dream, you enjoy the anticipation just as much as you enjoy the end product. You may come up with ideas about visiting a couple of car dealers in person or on-line and playing with colors, styles, and other features. The playful anticipation of the new dream is just as important as the dream itself. When you think about it, it’s really not the dream that is so impressive, it’s the way we think about the dream that connects us to happy. If dreams give us unhappy feelings of lack, uncertainty, anxiety, etc., you can be sure we are very far away from the dream that is waiting to show itself as a car.
Stop talking about dreams as solutions to your problems. You might hear a child whine, I really, really want this toy! I really, really, really NEED this toy! We may have an inner child whining about what we perceive as a dream or wish. My car is so unsafe, we complain to our friends. I really wish I had the money to buy a new car. The complaining about the car can turn into conversations about how unlucky we are, or how we don’t understand why some people can buy new cars every couple of years and we can’t even afford another used car If not checked we can complain indefinitely about the car dream. We don’t realize that it is the complaining that holds dream from ever coming true. Use your conversations to support your dream by talking about feelingsthat are already a daily reality because of the car dream..
Let the dream grow naturally. Give into and take for action ideas about getting the car as they come with ease. Appreciate that you are not creating the dream all by yourself, but sharing it with people who have already made your car. They have dreams of selling the car. Your dream and theirs will harmonize, making beautiful music of life!. The dream already has been created for you to enjoy. Enjoy the way the dream becomes more and more real for you each day. Talk to others about how much fun you are having as you explore the kind of car that’s coming your way. If you are smiling when you think or talk about your new car, you are letting the dream grow naturally. Your feelings are the sunshine of the dream. There is nothing you need to do except be present — happily!
Be open to the development of your dream You may find that your initial picture of a car changes as you enjoy, explore and discover new features that you previously did not know existed. If these new discoveries begin to give you financial or other concerns, gently stop and look for discoveries that give you a happier feeling. Here’s an example in my life. When it was time to purchase a new car, I thought I wanted a convertible. I chose one great-looking convertible and dreamed about it on-line and called dealers. I chose colors and felt the wind blowing in my hair. I loved that it had a hard top that mechanically opened from inside the trunk. The car itself looked so good to me. But I never was inclined to move toward purchasing the car. I received emails with special deals. It did not inspire me to purchase. I kept feeling that I was too exposed in a convertible. I am not the kind of person who wants to create a spectacle for others. But I still wanted all the feelings that the convertible held for me. I eventually chose a car that had the great feelings held by the old convertible car. The car I finally chose, held all of these feelings and so much more. It was not only fully equipped, it had a sun-roof that reached back to the 2nd row of seats. It represented a convertible to me but it was now my private convertible. Its the feeling that can help you appreciate the fact that dreams lead to a connection to our truest nature of well-being. If we find we are anxious or stubbornly working to get the dream, we are actually blocking the dream.
Uplift your attitude away from a dreamless life. All of us have dreams. Many of us try to fight the urge to believe in dreams and try life with a more realistic approach: no dreams, no disappointment. This attitude draws just that: a dreamless life. Nothing special. Every day like every day. No celebration. Getting along. A living sleeper. A we never win, attitude. If you can change and uplift this attitude toward a “might happen or a wouldn’t this be fun if” attitude, things can brighten up immediately
Bravely walk toward and into your dream When you want a dream to come true, you have to be willing to change from your current situation. You need to leave behind thoughts of what was just a moment ago. This takes constant vigilance. You have to stop and leave behind thoughts like, I just want to get a new car, so I’m not asking my brother to pick me up all the time. Or, I’m sick of getting a used car and having it break down! Or, Who do I think I am, having a new car! What will my family think about me? Will they think I am financially irresponsible? These, and similar thoughts, can keep you in a holding pattern. When you can become aware of these self-defeating thoughts and you can dismiss them, you can begin to bravely walk towards and into your dreams with better ease. You will remember that dreams already have the power to exist. We need only find ways to receive the dream.
Accept your dream knowing there is another dream just behind this one! When you bring home the car, you may have a few days and weeks to smell the new interior and enjoy the newness of the car. It’s so much fun! You may be able to appreciate and enjoy it as a symbol of how your dream developed into reality. In this way, the newness and satisfaction can remain for a long time. In the meantime, however, if you become more conscious of your life, you will notice that another dream is showing itself. This time you may have a dream to get a new job, or meet new people, travel to a far away land, or add an extension to your home. As you become aware of the affect dreams have on your life, you will move away from negative thinking, from doubt. You will appreciate the role dreams play in helping you grow in wisdom, love and peace. This is a hint of things to come.
It is helpful for me to write and explore my understanding of dreams and the state of on-going happy creation. I hope these thoughts are helpful for you like wise..