Feelings Used As Guides

Happy Friday!  Hope you enjoy the adventure of life today!

The video contains repetitive thoughts.  It is one thing to know something and another to act on it.  We can increase our level of happiness by relying on our feelings for direction and then acting on it.

Speaking of Love

All You Need Is Love

— but how does it serve you?

What if you think of love as an energy force that mirrors whatever it hears from you? What if you think of love as an energy force that is as close to you as you are to yourself?

You use a heart drawing as a symbol of love.  I heart you.   Everyone recognizes its meaning.

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Photo by Stokpic on Pexels.com

The heart has been beating ever since it became a heart.  It continually beats without stopping until the day you leave your body.  This symbol of love reminds you that life is constantly working in the background and constantly available to you.

When you do not understand how life works, you can become confused and feel like a leaf whirling about in the wind.  Yet the energy of love continues to beat within  every situation at hand.  Because love is non-physical it has the power to expand and duplicate situations that match your desires.  If you run, your heart beats faster.  If you go to sleep your heart beats to a slower pace.  Love expands all physical situations and is attentive to whatever direction you wish to take.  You may think you want to be happy, but your inner conversation complains about this or that. These complaints are heard and activated.  Your complaints are what love expands for you.  Is this something you have ever thought about?

You may not be aware of this interpretation. I hope it is helpful to you.  You may not be aware that love gives you whatever you want!  Now that you are aware, be careful about what you ask for in you thoughts and conversations.  And, what about complaining? When you complain you send requests that say you want to experience what the complaint looks like.

This sense of  expanding seems like something new,  You find yourself in a situation you do not like and you become frightened by the situation.  You become more and more concerned and the situation seems to get worse.  More things happen that make you frightened.

Example One:  You find that your coffee machine is broken.  It makes you clearly upset because you won’t have your coffee before leaving for work.  You begin to feel bad about your whole life.  While you get dressed, you remember how unlucky you are that you never have won the lottery.  It’s a recurring thought and it seems perfectly normal to have this thought as you get ready for work. You go into your closet and feel you can’t find a thing to wear!  You walk out to the car and step in a muddy puddle.  You say, Well, that’s just fine!  I’m a total failure!.    You go in and clean up your shoes, and your internal conversation goes on.  You think about how your mother told you how careless you are. You begin to believe her.  You stand up, look at the clock on the stove and see you are running 15 minutes late.  How did that happen?!  Can’t I even keep track of time.  No wonder I don’t get promotion!    You get in and start the car, and drive to the end of the street.  Sure, the traffic light can’t even help me!  you yell.  It appears that the light is stuck!  You wait and wait and wait!   …and feel miserable!

Example Two:  You find that your coffee machine is broken. You are surprised, but you are trained to STOP and PAUSE.  You look out the window and see the beautiful sunshine and watch a bird pecking around in your garden.  You look back at the coffee machine and remember it appears broken.  You then remember that you have a French Press somewhere in the cupboard.  You get some water to boil.  You begin to feel that this day is going to be a fun adventure.  You remember how much you love French Press coffee, and now have this opportunity.  While you wait for the water to boil, you finish dressing and think about how much you love the outfit you’ve put together.  You turn on some music, put the water into the French Press, squeeze the grounds and enjoy the aroma of the coffee.  Everything good always happens to me! you hear yourself say.  You put your coffee into a traveling mug and head for the door.  You feel great and enjoy the front yard  You see the mud puddle and miss it entirely.  You drive with ease and care.  You are ready to stop at the traffic light, but it continues to be green.  You begin to think about work and how you can make it a better place today! There’s a parking place right in front of your workplace, and you weren’t even looking for one.  Life is always great for you!

These examples demonstrate how the energy of love expands and contracts according to your thoughts.   Change always matches your inner conversations, your inner attitudes, your fears and your confidence.  If you have been following these blogs, you know things are going to continue to expand in a direction that of your thoughts.  Your love energy is matching your internal conversation just as it matches the beating of your heart when you are running or sleeping.

You may have been  threatened by the expansion and contractions of situations  Up to now, you may have  become fearful of bad situations and changes in your life.

How can we handle the fear of change?

Previously we have talked about listening to our emotions.

You can first STOP/PAUSE and look away to something more pleasing, then look back at the changed situation with new eyes.  Unless there is a true life/death situation, you do not need to react immediately.  And, you never need to give into negative impulses.

Ask yourself, how will this situation change with negative attitudes?  if I allow negative impulses to direct me, how will I ever get out of this situation?  You are in a world where the basis of who you are matches your every thought.  When you don’t like something, STOP/PAUSE.  Then ACCEPT THE SITUATION.  Accept it as a mirror of what you’ve been thinking about lately.  Make a note to change your way of complaining or talking or thinking.  Start looking at a brighter side of life and brighter situations will naturally follow.

When you begin to experiment with this basic idea, you will see just how futile it is to place blame on others.  You are free to suffer and you are free to flourish.  Negative thoughts can only produce negative situations.  Positive thoughts can only produce positive situations.  ….  Something to think about today.

Bound By Love

Accepting the situation in front of you, changes everything!

There are many opportunities to change unhappy situations around us.  I guess we just don’t know that we have that power!

Somehow we have come to believe that the only way to change a situation is to fight against it.  It appears that when bad things happen, we spend the majority of time talking about it and shaking our heads in confusion.  We talk and read about things we don’t like and we are confused how these things continue to escalate.

This happens with world current events and it happens in our world.  Situations present themselves to us; we may not be aware that it is our response to the situation that holds more of the same or changes everything.

I am speaking about situations that are within your present moment awareness.  If you think about it, there are millions, no billions, no an infinite amount of situations taking place at any moment.  You are aware of only one of these situations at a time.

Interesting perception! Only the situations that are within your awareness are the situations you believe as true.  But to another person, even a person in the same room, this very situation that holds all of your attention may not even exist in their world.

So what is it about situations that have the power to enthrall us or crumble our confidence?  What really are situations?  What part of a situation is an illusion? How can situations change in time? Where are we, anyway?

More interesting questions! Here are my answers for now.  We may be amazing beings who are able to create situational moments that are so detailed they can fool even ourselves.  We create these situations to objectify our thoughts.  We can expand as we see what we want and what we don’t want, and even what we want to explore further.

This type of perspective can be very helpful in changing situations that are unpleasant to us.  We now have a way to move on to the next lesson when we accept the situation in front of us.  We don’t have to respond to it or necessarily suffer from it.  The suffering may be coming from an illusion we desire to experience.  Why would you want to suffer, you ask?

I do not know.  I do know, however, that if I don’t want to suffer, and I believe I do not need to suffer, I will begin to live a completely different life.  It may seem like a miracle.  It may seem like a brand new door appears from nowhere, and opens up a new reality.  It has the power to surprise and delight me.

By accepting the situation in front of you, by keeping your heart open with optimism and love, great things can emerge.  Think about it.  You have  probably already experienced moments of exhilaration at one time or another.  Can you remember a lovely situation that completely embraced you?  You may have sustained the experienced the happy situation for hours, even days.  Then, you become a little uneasy and questioned whether this kind of well-being was a bit naive  You may have closed the door and entered another irritating situation that felt more familiar.   But it was miserable.  Hopefully, this article will open more doors to happy situations.  The first step is to allow or accept the door as it presents itself.  There is paradise on earth.  It is up to us to find and allow it through trial and error.

The sooner you realize your inner power to create your reality, the sooner you will be able to break the cycle of pain and suffering.  I welcome your thoughts on this topic.  Life can be just as amazing as us!  It is up to us!

Peace!  My upcoming blog hopefully can give some practical ways to change your situations through acceptance.  I look forward to seeing what will come out of these fingers!  Thank you for reading.

 

 

 

 

For the love of Mother’s Day

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Love expands.  It is movement, change, rearrangement and development. Love can withstand heat and cold, and when it does, it can change everything within and around it.  Love can soar above, below and within.  Love exists before, during and after our time here on earth.  Love is a good word we can use to hold everything together and apart. When I allow and trust in the dynamic nature of love, I am in awe.

Mother’s Day is fast approaching and I have these thoughts in relation to my conception of love.  Everyone has a mother, living or not, living locally or separated for whatever reason.  Usually we hear stories about how selfless our mothers were and how much of themselves.they gave to us.  We dutifully send our words and tokens of appreciation for their life of sacrifice. If we currently don’t get along with our mothers, or even if we do, we may feel discomfort and confusion with this day.  It may be even harder for those of us whose mother has passed away. We may wish to avoid Mother’s Day altogether.

A new attitude towards our concept of mothers may be able to help. A new attitude may permit everyone to celebrate with ease!  How do mothers think about themselves?

Do mothers  think about their state of motherhood as sacrifice, as selflessness?. I wonder if mothers have any time to think about themselves as an object of reverence, an idol of sorts. I wonder if mothers are comfortable with these misleading comments in greeting cards and news stories about mothers. Mothers are pretty busy just  being and doing and occasionally, sleeping!  They have learned that the less they think of themselves as beings who have been placed on pedestals, and more like human beings who enjoy the ups and down of their family, they flourish happily and with more ease.

I have experienced motherhood and grand motherhood . I don’t think it is at all helpful for me to think about my life as a mother in terms of selflessness.  For me, motherhood is  the vivid participation in movement, development, and growth in family living that makes me especially appreciative of being a mother.

This expansion and engagement of spirit makes motherhood so desirable. Love energizes us to go beyond what we imagined we could do.  Love moves us forward and outward.  Love creates.  Love enjoys.  Love continues to breathe  even when things appear stressful.  Love takes the higher view or sometimes appear to take no view at all as it mysteriously unfolds to new possibilities.

For me, motherhood has always been the privilege of participation.  It is delight in playing with Life itself, the planning and executing, the meltdowns and the ah-ha moments.

Whether you have been a mother or not, this year Mother’s Day can be a celebration for mothers and for children.  Yes, it singles out one player in the family, but hopefully, it can be a celebration of how love can expand our relationships beyond what we thought.  Hopefully it will be a time to listen and share with our mothers, in person or in thoughts. Ease up on the one-line speeches that can cut off the loves energy.  Instead, enjoy interaction with the family you are with, just the way they are now!  Whatever you presently feel about your own mother, take time to celebrate the current of love that continues to hold all of us together!

What is it about receiving advice?

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Up to now, I was uncomfortable with people giving me advice!  I still have that little toddler living within me, I want to do it myself! attitude.  I stopped listening when I heard someone tell me what I should do.  Up to now, I have not liked people assessing me.  It has made me feel uncomfortable and I closed my ears to remarks from these people as quickly as I could to protect myself.

Of course, I am not particularly aware that I am judging others or, as I like to say assess,ing, situations and people around me.  I was taught from a young age to be discerning: to judge whether it is safe or when is it foolish to proceed. Opinions on how I view better ways of doing things, roll off my tongue.  This ability to judge can be to my advantage.  It can also become a roadblock to any happy, working relationship.

Families talk about other family members all the time.  They assess each other’s well-being, or lack of it. They might not label these conversations as judgmental, but judgments are made.  Many offer advice stemming from their judgment.  They do this out of love, of course.  Unfortunately, these good intentions can lead to hurt feelings, misunderstanding, and moments of asking forgiveness. When people give you advice don’t you notice that sometimes you can become defensive and hurt, without even realizing it?  Do you ever feel like they have underestimated your abilities?  Or, do you feel the friend you thought you had does not even know you?  Advice-giving is a tricky thing.

Perhaps we cannot stop people from giving us advice, as they offer judgement to the soundness or insanity of our actions. Yet if we are willing to be less defensive when advice comes our way, we can benefit in ways we could never benefit alone.  Perhaps deep down we know this.

Those who judge us, do so in light of their own perceptions. This is especially true when they are specific to you.  The advice-givers are unique, and that means different from who you are. It is helpful to remember that they cannot see your reality from your eye level.  And here lies the potential for conflict and misunderstanding.  When your family or friends share their point of view, you may feel that you are asked to accept the advice in its totality regardless of whether you agree.  You may interpret these remarks to be a kind of intervention, an ultimatum. This is where the defense conflict begins.

A well-meaning friend or family member makes a comment and you respond by defending yourself. The advisor then becomes frustrated that their comments are taken in such a negative light. The conversation heightens as you quickly reject the intended gift. You see their frustration and escalate their advice to a level of an insult.  As each continue to exchange words, it becomes apparent that the subject needs to be changed. The advise-giver is distressed as well as the recipient  So what can you do to accept insights without conflict?  Oh, oh, here is my advice:

  1. Can you accept that others share from their present personal situation?  A person usually reacts to your apparent cry for help,  by watching your body, your body language, and so much more!  To complicate matters, the one who is sharing advice may be speaking after having had a stressful day themselves, and may be surprised by your sudden cry out for help.  The advisor may be in the supportive let’s fix it mode and is giving the best shot at fixing your present problem.  And here lies additional challenges.
    1. If you take the advice in its totality and follow it without question, you are disconnecting from the one who knows the most about how to make the fix, and that is yourself!  Immediately, you will feel the emotions of the disconnect. And it doesn’t feel good.
      1. Disconnecting from self shows itself in uneasy feelings, like despair, weakness, anger, fear, guilt, impatience, etc.
    2. Acting out of negative feelings, usually brings you to your imagined defensive knees of separation, and the conversation goes to areas of conflict that were never intended.
    3. If you can take a step back and pause when someone offers advice, you will realize
      1. You complained of something in your life and sounded like you could use some help.  You asked for help.
      2. There may or may not be gold in the advice that is given.  That is up to you to discern.
      3. Whether advice was delivered loudly or softly, awkwardly or with finesse, there may be value hidden within.  Statements may sound like:
        • You shouldn’t be thinking about spending money on big projects now!, or
        • Here’s something I learned about financially planning for future surprises.  If you like, I can share some articles with you.
      4. These comments are still from the advisor’s point of view.  They are given to you from their hearts but it is always from their perspective.
  2. Accept the assessment at face value.  Thank you, I will consider your comments carefully.
    1. Remember that when someone gives suggestions about how to run your life situations, your ego translates what is said.  You may be fighting the memories of years with parent’s rules and over-protectiveness.  Your friend’s advice may be complicated by you with feelings of parental defensiveness.  When this occurs you cannot hear the attempt to share goodwill now in the present moment.  You may be triggered to interrupt and fight back.
    2. When you understand you are a complex human being with a history, you will  stop, pause, breathe and appreciate the opportunity of the present moment before reacting.
    3. A remark that can provide a good atmosphere of interchange could be:  I love that you care enough to say this.  You are a good friend. 
    4. If you find yourself arguing, explaining why you don’t need to do whatever is advised, you are in a parent/child-relationship moment.  This realization may be embarrassing to you. It is what it is.  Step back and reconnect with the beautiful positive person you are.  Change your attitude to allow the your way of relating to an adult-to-adult conversation.
    5. You’ve heard it before, don’t take it so personally.  Try to sort through advice like you would sort through a smorgasbord of goodies.  Some are not to your liking; some are.  It is for your pleasure to take whatever is helpful and let go of what is not, with gratitude, with whimsy and delight.

There are times when you may want to hide from others.  It is uncomfortable to defend against what we perceive as attacks of judgement.  We can easily become fearful of assessments that judge our appearance, our actions, our achievements or lack of achievements.

If you continually hide, you may miss out on a robust view of life.  Opinions from loved ones can be an opportunity to see beyond your view.   Remember, you don’t have to take advice in its totality or at all.  But listening through you heart can be an enlightening experience. What do you think?  Is it better to hide out away from advice-givers or is it more helpful to listen carefully and see what parts fit and what parts of the advise can be dismissed.

Accept the love that is intended for you when people share their opinions.  You may be able to appreciate each time family or friends try to help.  Enjoy open communication and allow your personal expansion.  Receiving advice can be beneficial after all!

Creating Thoughts That Serve You!

Guide your thoughts to serve you

This is the best.  Copy and paste it, print it and put it up on your wall.  It can bring consciousness to you as you pass it in the hallway.  Or, you could use it as your desktop wallpaper.  It has the power to remind you to choose thoughts that serve you.

I can choose my thoughts.  The thing is, I am usually so unconscious as to what my mind is conversing about at a constant pace that I am not usually aware that I have a choice at all!  Thoughts seem to be my ego and I often listen to that long-time friend.  It says I don’t have a choice at all!

But a choice I have.  I can be servants to my thoughts.  My thoughts tell me that the economy is bad.  I read the news to find out if this is true.  And, of course, I find lots of articles that will tell me that everyone better be concerned.  And, so I worry and feel sick and scared, and irritated at whoever comes into my midst.  It is no fun being a servant of my careless thoughts.

I need to remind myself that my mind has an automatic function and if left unattended will automatically dish out thoughts previously thought or read about. . It’s the reason I can type these words so easily, without even being aware of what letters I’m tapping on.   The mind can sort out and remember data that comes to me  just like a computer. My ego has developed within the mind and can dish up thoughts to its satisfaction, like eating when I’m not hungry.  If I don’t organize that data the way I, my happiest self, want it to serve me, if I just let the data run every which way, my body will receive instructions.  Yes.  My body is  dependent on my mind and my heart.

The question is, do I want to let the mind have free-wheeling power over my existence?

For me the answer is an emphatic, NO!  Well, not when it feeds me emotions of fear, worry, irritation, hopelessness, that type of thing.  But I like the automatic body directions, like walking and dancing and, yes, typing!

Unless I am aware of my thoughts, they run me.  I keep hearing this, but I keep ignoring this seemingly simple fact.   It is so easy to take orders from the thoughts.  I often act on thoughts that I did not really choose, and then regret it as if I had a choice.  But I did have a choice.  I could have chosen to put thoughts into my mind that were pleasant and helpful for me to gain my dreams!  I could have chosen to learn a new skill, take a new course, listen to a new piece of music, sketch or paint, exercise, mediate, visit with friends, take a walk, play a game with my family.  I did not have to let outside random news stories take possession of my life and the health of my body.

And I haven’t even talked about commercials!

I worry about the future of my job.  I worry about the amount of money I will need to survive in the future.  I worry just about everything when I read the news.  I was taught in school to be civic minded by reading current events.  So even though the news has always been geared to what is shockingly wrong, I dutifully read, if I don’t consciously stop myself.  Many times I am  just curious to know what is going on in the world.  I guess I believe I’m going to read some good news.  It never happens and I am filling my mind with fear, concern, disgust, judgements about things I really don’t even know about because I’m reading a 2nd hand account.   The fact is, it is challenging to read the news and stay conscious, alert, enough to sort through what I will allow myself to think about.

Here comes the good stuff.  It is possible to make my thoughts serve me.  What is it that I want.  I want to reap the benefits of my core nature, love and happiness.  These sweet energies do not exist in worry and concern.  Negative thoughts are like the worst party poopers!  These thoughts try to cover up and make me forget that there is such a thing as love and happiness.  These thoughts are determined to eliminate any enjoyment.  Well enough about the negative thoughts.

The thing is, I have to first be aware that they are running rapid in my mind and making my life miserable.  Once I can do that, — ah! — I can choose a few thoughts of my own.  I can clean-up the computer of my mind and create a most magnificent day for myself and for everyone around me.

That is the choice we all have.  Whenever you feel miserable, you can look to our thoughts.  What have you been thinking about?  If you have just been reacting to a friend, to a news story, to a car who cut in front of you, to the load of work you have to accomplish, chances are you are now servants of those thoughts.  You don’t like being servants of negativity.  The alternative, of course, is to change your upload of thoughts.

Dare to enjoy life by enjoying life!  Leave the news behind.  News isn’t new.  It was cautioning us to be very a very afraid when I was a child and it is no different now.  We will always have people telling us that the end is near.  The question is, will we listen?

Will we train our mind to think thoughts that serve us and our pursuit of happiness.  It will take courage and discipline and delight and fun, but I think we are up to it.  This is possible because our core of love is strong beyond estimation!

No matter what  you perceive your situation to be, create thoughts that will permit you to have a most satisfying and happy day!